Sunday, September 16, 2012

Ten Horror Movies That Should Be Remade!

        The horror genre is probably one of the most popular genres in cinema. One of the biggest reasons for us fans is that we just love the roller coaster ride that a horror movie gives us. It shakes us up, makes us laugh, creeps us out, disturbs us, and on rare occasions even scares us.  The genre is also popular among filmmakers because horror movies especially slasher flicks can be very cheap to make. Horror has shifted from monsters and ghosts to maniacial killers stalking teenagers to splater flicks that ooze blood and gore. Amongst these have also been gimmicks or cash ins such as found footage, 3D, and sequels. Sequels in the horror genre really began around the 1970s and escalated into huge franchises in the 1980s with such franchises as Friday The 13th, A Nightmare On Elm Street, Halloween, and so many others. While sequels are very popular within the horror genre especially the slasher flicks, there is one filmmaking method that has always been around, but has escalated to extreme heights around the late '90s and early '00s and that is the re-telling or remake as it is now called. By now, there are so many terms to this word such as re-imagining or reboot. The process of re-telling a classic or ancient story to a new generation is actually nothing new. For centuries, people told classic ghost stories and famous urban legends around a campfire, each changing the names and some of the situations, but the core of the story was always in tact. Now, it is happening in Hollywood. It's a subject that has brought up a lot of debate. Has Hollywood run out of originality? Is the horror film doomed to extinction? My view is no and no. Remakes, like sequels, will make money most if not all of the time. Remakes have been around a long time, the only reason people get pissed when you bring them up is that almost everything is getting remade for the 21st Century. So, horror fans tend to look elsewhere for new films such as the indie scene or foreign horror films. I personally don't mind remakes or sequels as long as they are fun and entertaining to me. But, of course, what entertains me may piss others off.  With all that said, I have decided since my "Ten Sequels That Must Be Made!" article was such a huge hit among genre fans, I would write a follow up dealing with remakes in the horror genre that I personally would love to watch. So, lights, camera, REMAKE!

         1) THE FUNHOUSE (1981)

         While I personally dig director Tobe Hooper's (The Texas Chainsaw Massacre/Eaten Alive) 1981 teen slasher flick, it's definitely a movie that could use an update. There's something errie about carnivals that still applies today. Plus, I felt this film took too long to get to the horror elements and that the villain came off kinda goofy. The plot is that four teenagers go to the local carnival. As the park is about to close, they decide to spend the night inside The Funhouse. They end up witnessing a murder and soon the killer starts picking them off one by one while they are locked inside. The way I could see a remake working is if everyone who worked at this carnival turned out to be psychos. Obviously have a homage to the original with a guy in a Franeknstein mask but he's not the villain like we would think. I could see someone like Sid Haig or Robert Englund playing the carnival barker.  Basically a group of teens or college friends are on a road trip and decide to stop at the local carnival. What they don't know is that once you enter this carnival, there's no way out alive. The people working the carnival use real corpses inside The Funhouse and everyone thinks it is part of the show. Kinda like House of Wax (2005), but at a carnival fairground. I'd so watch this movie!

                             2) GRADUATION DAY (1981)

       This is a movie that was just really bad! Graduation Day (1981) told the story of some High School track team that is getting picked off one by one by a killer dressed in a fencing outfit leading up to graduation after one of the girls dies while running.  There's so many ways you could make a much better slasher flick using the Graduation Day holiday. You can go the revenge route or just have someone crazy picking off the classmates one by one on Graduation Day. Instead of a fencing outfit, they could wear the mascot outfit or be wearing a cap and gown and just shadow their face till the climax. Gotta use death by football though! And maybe do a roller skating death scene while some band is playing, just not for 10 minutes straight.

                          3)  MADMAN (1982)

      This was a film with an interesting idea, but had poor execution. There's a legend of a crazed hillbilly named Madman Marz and if you say his name then his soul comes to life and will kill anyone in the woods where he was put to rest. Which obviously puts a group of teens at a local summer camp in grave danger!  Being a huge fan of backwoods slashers, I could so see this getting a decent update.

                         4)  RESIDENT EVIL (REBOOT)

         I gotta be honest, I love the Paul W.S. Anderson Resident Evil movie franchise. They are fun popcorn movies with loads of action and monsters. But, like many hardcore fans of the original 1996 video game, I would love to see a more accurate movie version of the games. I've read where Anderson plans to end his very successful and popular Resident Evil franchise at 6 movies. In my opinion, this would be a great opportunity for Sony to actually adapt the games into live action movies. For instance, reboot the franchise and the reboot basically being a live action incarnation of the classic 1996 video game where the S.T.A.R.S team is hiding out inside the Umbrella mansion and discovers behind every dark corridor lurks a new monster. Then, they could make a sequel which would be the live action incarnation of Resident Evil 2 that features Police Officer Leon S. Kennedy and Chris' sister Claire Redfield as they battle zombies in Racoon City before taking shelter in a Police Station where even more horrors lurk ahead of them. You see where I'm going with this? I dug the Anderson films for being their own thing, but would absolutely love to see a much more faithful adaptation of the popular horror survival games.

                   5) GIRLS NITE OUT (1982)


     A group of college girls decide to have a scavenger hunt. Little do they know that a masked killer also wants to play.  This was a pretty weird movie especially the twist, but I could see this getting a decent update with a much better killer. Although, I do kinda like the bear claw glove the killer wears that actually came three years before Freddy Krueger.

                  6)  HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME (1981)

            While I do enjoy this slasher flick from 1981, I wouldn't mind seeing it remade.  A girl is preparing for her 18th Birthday, but her friends keep getting killed one by one.  There's a lot that could be done here.

                 7) NIGHT SCHOOL (1981)

         A killer wearing a motorcycle helmet is killing the girls at a local night school.  This movie was pretty forgettable to me, but I love the whole motorcycle rider costume and the whole night school setting. Could make for an interesting re-imagining.

               8) NEW YEAR'S EVIL (1980)

         A mysterious killer calls a DJ and tells her that people are going to die when the clock strikes twelve on New Year's Eve. I heard that this one was pretty bad. But, I do like the idea of a horror film especially a slasher taking place on New Year's Eve, which is supposed to be a time of celebration but turns into a night of pure terror.

              9)  SORORITY HOUSE MASSACRE (1986)

      A girl's brother kills her whole family. She survives by hiding in the basement. Now, it is years later and she is going to college and joins a sorority. Her brother escapes from a mental hospital and arrives at her college to kill her and her new friends one by one. Basically a total ripoff of John Carpenter's Halloween. I love college slasher flicks and would like to see this re-imagined with a much more interesting plot. At least this movie didn't use stock footage from a totally different movie (The Slumber Party Massacre) like it's sequel "Sorority House Massacre II" did.

                10)  PIECES (1982)

        A mysterious killer begins killing the girls on a college campus one by one with a chainsaw in search of finding the pieces to make the perfect woman. I do kinda like this film, but I feel it could have been so much better. Love the plot with the killer looking for pieces to make one woman. It's a pretty twisted picture that could use a new twist.


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